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I watched a horror film the other day called Cabin Fever. The minute I saw a bunch of teenagers, I really should have known it was basically going to be predictable.

And it didn’t disappoint (so to speak).

Teenager splits from group of friends to look for help. Duh.

Did I mention ‘attractive’ and ‘female’ too?

And then she walks into an empty house ON HER OWN saying the predictable ‘hello?’, ‘hello?’, ‘anybody home?’

Obviously there isn’t or else the frikkin door wouldn’t be frikkin open.

Anyway, she was going for help because this weird crazy stranger guy thing attacked her and her friends the night before as they sat beside a campfire. He was trying to take their car so he got shot but he was still moving towards them and threatening them until he was set on fire - and even then, he ran away not as erratically as you’d expect.

Turns out he was infected with some kind of virus. He died in a nearby water reservoir and that’s how he ended up infecting other people.

One by one, the teenagers got killed off by the virus.

I don’t mind sharing details ‘cos I thought the film was slightly shitty. But I almost always honour a horror film no matter how crap by watching it all the way through.

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Ok, maybe I’m being a tad harsh. Some bits were ok. But I can’t stand horror films that aren’t that scary. And I can’t stand horror films with the predictable measure of teenagers, screams and the odd dufus thrown in.

I’m not saying that teenagers (or actors pretending to be) can’t act, or that the directors, producers and scriptwriters aren’t good — but a different formula more often than not would be great thanks.

Ok, I’m done with my little moan.

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